At your service

So I guess the way this works is you just start writing and 20 years later you have 800,000 words and your words live forever in the information even if you by that point are perhaps moldering. So I write because I need to understand myself. My name is Belinda but that isn't the name I am mostly known by since I am transgendered late in life, and usually male but this blog belongs to Belinda.

I have come to know a lot of trannies and sissies and t-girls and i have known quite a few women, married them, fathered them and oh right envied them, or did I?
Some of us want to be girls or why the big closets full of frou frou. Some of us want to be the servants of Women, or why the elaborate fantasies with curtsies, and yes Mistress and Mistress may I. Some of us never seem to have a clue.

Let's start with a simple concept: The gendered soul. Catholics and Mormons have gendered souls I believe. Jesus is a boy and you will be a boy forever and ever and ever. Damn! And the gendered soul is one of the ways of understanding the gurls. After all, if your soul is female but you end up in a male body, well that certainly explains a lot doesn't it? or does it. And why that error on the transsubstantial plane is so much more common than male souls trapped ..trapped I say in female bodies. Well who knows.

I guess I don't believe it. Me I am a hindu. well..i am not sure that if you are raised a catholic in the united states from european ancestors you could ever really be a hindu. But I chant the name of devi most mornings, and try to see Her, and feel Her and stay mostly chaste for Her and of course that is a wonderful kind of a religion for a tranny and a sissy. But of course like Belinda, Devi is a manifestation, a piece of the lila if a rather substantial piece, and the soul the Hindu Atman, the Buddhist soul.(or not) is genderless, gender free.

And wouldn't we all want to be that... or would we?